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Audiogeist
Sharon Harriott
United Kingdom, London

Words: 100
Access: Public
Comments: 14

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The Gathering: Wee Challenge #25

Daisy held her breath as she ran her Stanley knife along the cardboard edge. She dropped the knife onto the table amongst the bank statements and bills; her future balanced precariously on the box's contents.

One thousand ‘Aphrodite’ dresses. She’d have to check each one before sending them to Apex Stores. She examined the soft cotton, the gold embroidery on floaty white fabric. Her heart stopped as she noticed the gathering, the design feature that was meant to accentuate the décolletage, was in fact at the back of the dress.

Daisy hit the floor with a resounding thud.

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Comments  
Chris Millar Comment by: Chris Millar - 2008-02-13 05:28
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Loved this. My initail idea for this challenge was some sort of sewing tale, but i could not work out how to frame it.

Well Done
karjon Comment by: karjon Online- 2008-02-13 04:37
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Ah - nice take on 'gathering' - I hadn't thought of that definition.

I agree with Grae about knife v blade.

'make or break' and 'resounding thud' - are a little cliched, and if you can think of alternatives it wouldn't do any harm to change them.

Other than that, very well done. Thanks for the read.

Cheers

Karen
sarra Comment by: sarra - 2008-02-12 18:31
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HAHAH! this take on 'gathering' is something that I wouldn't have thought of!
Brilliant job as usual!
lancslass Comment by: lancslass - 2008-02-12 17:50
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Ah! Sharon, so well done. Your meaning of 'gathering' was the first I thought of but I couldn't come up with half a story for it. You came up with such a good one, and something I can relate to. Great job.
mrsspark Comment by: mrsspark - 2008-02-12 11:57
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Ha! Not much I can add to the comments below - a really original take on the challenge title.

Of course, it serves Daisy right for opening such an important package with a stanley blade. I only hope she's forgotten that it's so close at hand when she comes round.

Thanks as always for the read XX
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