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How Fusty you do grow--
nagging at me like an Old Scratch!
She circles!
She taunts! She Whispers!
with A "Hissssss!"
So Old are you
to be without completion,
How Your poor heart
must drown in its own excretions--
The way you survive
like a thirty-two-year-dormant-lungfish!
And how Nettled I do grow!
When your fuel exasperates my fire
just to watch its arches rise
like the hair on a cat's black back!
Now Black Cat circles!
Black Cat taunts! Black Cat Whispers!
with A "Hissssss!"
Oh! How you have Spent me!
Just as a deer stretched at its neck--
As you proceed to drain;
to siphon the blood from the veins--
Silently awaiting this massacre of death!
And The deer circles!
The deer taunts! The deer Whispers!
with A "Hissssss!"
Ahhh...but yes!
The hunter is still incapable of fetching its breath!
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"Fusty" is one of the greatest words ever created. I'm so glad that you used it...honestly I think that it almost makes the entire poem. I wish that I had thought of it. ;)
I keep trying to put my finger on why exactly I have loved this poem so much for so long. I used to think that it was simply because it was such a step away from your other stuff, that it just stood out. I'm beginning to believe it has more to do with history. Not our history, not now, at least...not in this lifetime, but in a different one. It just feels really old...but in a good way, like it stemmed from more than what you were going through at the time all the way back to what you were going through before our time.
i like this very much. i like the marriage of words and the haunted feeling. although i like the sense of the last line, i wonder if a more direct "the hunter cannot fetch its breath" might be stronger. simply a suggestion. consider it lightly.
