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Hmm. Corpse-in-a-box. It could catch on. Let's patent it!
Don't forget I only get to enter one cinquain ('Watching you Grow'). Plus, it's definitely not my turn to win. Plus, there are some really, really good entries in this one. But thank you, Grae. |
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'You're a very good poet, Rosie.'
See, if Cheryl says it then it must be true. You can write prose like a good 'un and now you are poetically endorsed. Where do you go from here?
Loved your Cinquains (definitely no prize for me this month) and loved the many moods and themes covered by them.
'surprise' is what you get with a 'jack in a box' so a definite surprise if that coffin lid flies up and the occupant shouts out 'surprise'
Thanks for the read(s) - Grae:) |
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Comment by: alien Online- 2008-02-26 02:34
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Newcomer made me laugh! Nice twist. Good piece.
Surprise is a really powerful one and it struck at me a little as I've recently lost a dear friend. He was a big chap and I couldn't believe how small his coffin looked. But yes - Another very good one.
Night-time is something I think most of us can identify with. It's really nice - the way you say 'I can't start to dream yet' - it's a lovely subtle expression and all sorts of levels spring from it.
All these are really well-crafted and thoughtfully made.
You're a very good poet, Rosie. |
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Comment by: sudipal - 2008-02-25 16:57
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| I admire the twists you've been able to pull off on these; my favorite is the first one. |
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I actually meant a coffin - the one in question was surprisingly small... So no, you're not being dense - and you are being morbid, but that was spot-on!
Cheers for reading and commenting, Ada. |
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