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TirzahLaughs
Lou Goodwin
United States

Words: 75
Access: Public
Comments: 1

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Hot-Wired

I grow tired, so tired
My body hot-wired

Revved up, wild
Motor refuses to idle

Road blind
Lost in dizzy night

Sirens sputter bright
Inner gears grind

Wanted sleep calls
Inward leaning walls

I go and I go
My body won't slow

Engine smokes
Heart in my throat

Tank on E
Lungs can't breath

Slam the pedal down
I spin, spin around

Horns blare, lights flash,
In the middle of everything...
I crash.

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Comments  
Andrew Thurman Comment by: Andrew Thurman - 2008-03-16 13:03
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I have done something remarkably similar in the middle of a party once.

Is it actually about a car crash? If so the weaving metaphors and descriptions are exceptional. Either way it is very cool imagery and some cool rhymes. Normally I find rhymes kinda cheesy, but they work well and im sure you use some cool scheme.
"E" and "breathe" were fun in particular to say out loud. Well done.
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By TirzahLaughs

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