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mynamelez
Leslie Blackwell
New Zealand, Wellington

Words: 66
Access: Public
Comments: 5

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A Naga-uta to the Easter Bunny - Alien Poetry #11

(A wierd and wacky Naga-uta)

The Easter Bunny
Gathers sweet eggs
To garb in tin foil
Hop-hop gather-gather garb
No time for carrot
Or a “what’s up doc?”
Crossing buns
Twitching his whiskers
Baking buttons
Cheerful as the grinning sun
Often he cries
When they call him a fake
For he is real
To those who imagine
And accept
The hop-gather-garb of
The Easter Bunny

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Comments  
Boonrassi Comment by: Boonrassi - 2008-03-12 09:19
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i read this vivid poem over and over Leslie, and
it made me smile..
its very unrestrained and confident.
thanks for playing..
T
mynamelez Comment by: mynamelez - 2008-03-11 21:41
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thanks for your comments. Please be patient while I rework through the syllables.
RobinE Comment by: RobinE - 2008-03-11 21:35
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Great, I love it LOL ;) Made me smile!

Robin
Thula7 Comment by: Thula7 Online- 2008-03-11 13:47
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Funny, nice, I like it a lot. The syllable count is off on a few lines, so not really a naga uta as it sits. But I'm sure you could fix that and it would be great.

Thanks.
frees340 Comment by: frees340 - 2008-03-11 08:45
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A nice, happy poem. Good to remind people that all poetry isnt necessarily bad or evil or about death and sex.
some crits:
Or a “eh what’s up doc?”
Working dawn to dusk
He crosses his buns
check the syllable count here.
in fact, recheck the syllable count all over. It will make this poem infinetly more eligible.
Great job!
Vyas
1

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