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junenandy
June N
India

Words: 110
Access: Public
Comments: 16

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“Will wait for You”

I wish I could refuse you,
When you said, “I’ll be waiting for you”.

I wish I could run away fast,
When you said, “Help me to forget my past”.

I wish I could shut my ears tight,
When you said, “let me cry in your bosom and be light.”

I wish I could break myself loose,
When you said, “Let me hold on to you close”.

I wish I could escape your bygone primes,
When you said, “help me forget my failed times”.

I wish, Yes I wish, You could read my sign,
When you said, “Tell me why shouldn’t I cherish the old love of mine?”

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Comments  
dogwitch Comment by: dogwitch - 2008-05-30 11:25
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Great poem, especially the last two lines. I'm not usually a fan of rhyming poems but I really like this one.
mattarnold Comment by: mattarnold - 2008-03-22 00:45
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effecive use of pairing
(I wish I could: when you said)

loved it..m
junenandy Comment by: junenandy - 2008-03-20 22:08
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Chris,

I guess Men will refuse to change ever.What a sexist comment that was.."a desperate frantic women who's mind is going a million thoughts a second, then ok".

Wow, No Sir, I don't think tweaking needed. Let be it that way.Must I conform to the tradition always?
standingstrong87 Comment by: standingstrong87 - 2008-03-20 20:00
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well, i like the idea and the form, personally, it seems a bit choppy/rough. but if that is what you are going for, a desperate frantic women who's mind is going a million thoughts a second, then ok, but still, might need some tweaking. ;)
junenandy Comment by: junenandy - 2008-03-20 11:21
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Timothy, you are being kind to me..

Thanks.
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