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| Very imaginative. |
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| You have some very interesting ideas in your writing. I can catch your flow pretty easily. Keep writing! |
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| I really liked this... good work... my fav line being..."A body so tall that looking at your feet will take your breath away." wow... |
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Wow I love the feel of this. This line jumped out at me,
"Clench your fist and squeeze your will into a weapon." - I think it has so many meanings. Because a clenced fist is a weapon and when we clench our fists it's us restraining our anger or our emotions our firsts are little weapons waiting to explode, waiting for the right word ...
So in short, great poem.
I also really like this line,
"A body so tall that looking at your feet will take your breath away." |
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Comment by: Dakota - 2008-03-17 03:45
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Really powerful!
'Your massive heart engine beats.'
TERRIFIC LINE. And eyes made of fire.
So many treats. Really good work.
'Squeeze your will into a weapon...'
Amazing. One for the library. |
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