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Boonrassi
Timothy Briggs
United States, fl, ft lauderdale

Words: 376
Access: Public
Comments: 23

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Starlight's Fate

i failed in my task of finding the winning Wee Story myself and couldnt resist writing about the way the winner was chosen.
um.... im sorry?
_ _ for italics.


“Starlight!”

“Yes, daddy!”

Star's three year old legs hurled her into the room. “Can I have some candy?”

“Doubtful. I need your help, look.”

A sliver of diamond, a 1938 mercury dime, a minuscule, uncut, dull emerald, and an 800 year old, gold, Aztec frog the size of a pencil eraser shone on the desk.

Star reached for the frog.

“Each one of these pretty things stands for a story Daddy read.” Tim snatched at the printer. “I'm going to wrap each one in a sheet of paper.”

“I watched Toy Story a couple days. I think five.”

“That's good; I love that movie. I'm with Star Command, of course I can fly!”

The gold frog vanished in crumpled paper. A sheet of white folded around the glittering dime.

“Little one, daddy?” She squinted at her two pinched fingers. “Little jelly bean one?”

Tim laughed. “No candy, my love.” Paper crackled. “Get your toy basket off the shelf, the wicker one.”

“Ricker one, ricker one; this one?”

“Ya. Dump it out.”

A kaleidoscope, empty plastic easter eggs, a little spatula, Krusty the clown, a small black board all covered in chalk, and some plastic carrots rained on the floor.

“Now, all the paper balls go in the basket. Let me shake 'em up.”

The balls bounced against woven walls, and in

and out

of light.

“You get to pick one now.”

“How come you're not doing it?”

“Because they're all examples of effective writing, honey. It's like choosing between perfect oranges, what's the point. They're all _oranges_. They're all bright and tangy smelling, and tasty and juicy. The fruit pops in your mouth. They drip. And these here ... these are all _stories_.


“Oh.” She poked her chin with a finger, twisted it. “If I get a bat, can I teach it to be a parrot?”

“You bet. Now chose one.”

Tim jiggled the basket. A lava lamp cast peach light; hot wax

s
t
r
e
t
c
h
e
d

slowly

and

.............................................................................snapped.

Starlight touched a ball of paper.

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Comments  
WLC Comment by: WLC Online- 2008-06-06 07:05
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The fantastic writing style aside...which goes without need of my gushing! This is so charming it leaves me wanting to hug you both.

"If I get a bat, can I teach it to be a parrot?"
"You bet. Now chose one."-------------enchanting exchange.

A smart person recently reminded me, "Zinsser says, 'Writing is visual--it catches the eye before it has a chance to catch the brain.'" You've created the perfect example of that.

Also loved the honesty.
L J Comment by: L J - 2008-04-21 09:46
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There's a feeling of magic to the way in which you "did not choose the winner". Magic's good. Oh, sorry, I forgot about black magic. But this is good magic. Your method has become a title and a story, now that's something. Thanks for sharing, Tim.
rupertdepaula Comment by: rupertdepaula - 2008-04-03 12:44
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seemes like as good a method as any!
thelonelyguy Comment by: thelonelyguy - 2008-04-02 15:46
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sweet. I got a tangible sense of these people. lovely writing.
mrsspark Comment by: mrsspark - 2008-04-01 05:45
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Ha ha! No point choosing between oranges, Tim (but then oranges are not the only fruit).

What can I say that hasn't already been said? Not much. But I'll say heartwarming again. You can never have too many of those.

The formatting at the end is fantastic - mirrors the playful tone of the dialogue.

Ah haa! One nasty nitpick. I'm pretty sure 'blackboard' is all one word. Took me ages to find that ;-)
Thanks as always for the read. XX
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By Boonrassi

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