Rock-a-bye baby, on the treetop; when the wind blows the cradle with fall. The song replayed in her mind, as she sat in the cold metal chair waiting, for the guards to let her mother in. She felt something in her; was it hate? How could a child hate their mother; the same person who brought you into this world?

A buzz was sounded and her mother walked in, accompanied by a guard. She sat in the chair across her. The only thing between them was a thin glass window, with a hole to talk into. Camille stared at her mother, her flesh and blood. She tried to remember the last time, she had seen her. She was wearing a yellow dress, and had her hair curled. But, that was then, this was now, and the woman in front of her wasn’t the same woman as before. Her hair had become thinner; she lost so much weight, that she looked fragile. Even, her eyes, they did not hold the same love she used to know. Her eyes- they were full of pain, full of unseen horrors. Camille shook her head in shame, when she noticed the black ring around her mom’s eyes.

Her mom stared down at the table in front of her. She was too ashamed to look at her daughter in the eye. They sat there in silence, for awhile until Camille spoke up. “So…I’m guessing you came here to sit in silence?” She asked her mother. Of course she would be bitter to see her mother, but did she care? Her mother had gone beyond what was normal and betrayed her. How could she have done such an awful thing to her daughter- Just because of a man?

“Baby-” “No, please don’t start with that bullshit Paris. I wasn’t your baby when he raped me, beat me and caused all that pain. Naw, he was your baby! Don’t you sit here and act like everything is ok; because it isn’t, and it’ll never be.” Camille told her mom. Growing up, she wasn’t allowed to call her mother, mom, like any other child. She was told, to call her mom by her first name; because it made her feel young. She didn’t have a mom, except for her aunt; who did everything for her. “Ok. I know how you feel, it’s just that-” She cut her mother off again, and chuckled, “Are you serious? You’re gonna tell me, you know exactly how I feel?” She shook her head and couldn’t believe the woman who sat right in front her. She was right, she wasn’t a mother. She was just Paris, the woman who God cursed her with; to bring forth on this earth.

She gritted her teeth together, and tried her hardest not to get too angry. She was taking anger management classes in jail, and it was so far helping her a little. But, she wanted to cry. She didn’t want to see her mother anymore. “Guards, I’m done.” She told the police men who stood there watching the scene. The guard soon took her out of the room, and as she turned around to watch, she could see a teardrop make its way down, her mom’s cheek.

When she returned back to her cell, she lied on her hard bed and faced the wall. She couldn’t help but cry and regret being alive. She closed her eyes and saw his face; the day it all began…

Flashback:

Age 9
“Rock-a-bye baby, on the treetop, when the wind blows, the cradle will fall” She sung, rocking her tiny baby doll in her hands. He walked inside of her room and stood there staring at her. “What you doing there?” He asked her. The strong smell of alcohol and weed filled the room, making little Camille cough. “Nothing, playing with my baby.” She stated, scared to look him in the eyes. There was something evil about his eyes and it scared her. “So you like baby’s huh? See if you were older, I would give you a baby of your own.” He said then chuckled. She looked at him scared, and wished her mom was home. Whenever she left her home with him, he would give her stares; nasty stares.

He approached her and kneeled down to be at eye level with her. He opened his mouth to breath, and the strong smell of alcohol on his breath hit her nose. She turned away in disgust and fear. “Wanna play a game?” He asked her. She looked at him, afraid to answer him. “C’mon don’t be scared, it’s a fun game.” She swallowed down hard spit and shook her head no. “Why not? It’s really fun, trust me.” “But, I have to umm, go to sleep. It’s almost close to bedtime.” She replied, with an excuse. It really was close to her bedtime, and soon her mom would be home. “But, if you don’t tell mommy, I won’t tell mommy; about our secret game either. It’s a really fun game, and trust me it won’t hurt a bit.” He smiled at her. She didn’t know what to do. If she just did what he said, he would leave her alone; because if she didn’t he’ll beat her. She agreed to it, and he smiled at her.

He told her to sit on his lap and he slid his hand up her dress. She was scared at first and flinched, but he assured her, everything would be ok. She started crying and wanting her mom to be home, but he kissed her on the cheek and told her, that even mommy enjoyed the same game. “I don’t wanna be like mommy.” Is what she replied, and he told her, not to worry.

That night, he violated her by touching her inappropriately; and when her mom came home, she was in bed crying. She could hear, them next door arguing about him being drunk. Was she supposed to tell her mom, about what happened? She hated when her mom was angry and yelled- she didn’t want to be the cause of it either.

Age 14
She came home from school, to see him sitting on the couch watching TV, and drinking a bottle of Budweiser. She knew her mom wasn’t home, when she noticed the empty bottles, on the counter in the kitchen. Not only was he always messy, but he could care less.

She ignored his presence and made her way to her room. When she got inside, she started undressing and changing into comfortable sweats. She was in her underwear, when he barged into her bedroom. She jumped and turned to look at him, then grabbed her towel and covered herself. “Umm, what do you want?!” She scolded towards him. He looked her up and down not caring what she was saying to him. He only wanted one thing, and he was tired of waiting for it.

“I want you, and I’m tired of all these games you’re playing.” He slurred his words, as he spoke. She was in fear. Her mother was nowhere near the house and it was just them. “Can you please leave?” She asked him nicely, but he refused. He got closer to her, and grabbed her arm tightly. “Get off me!” She yelled, trying to push him off of her. He didn’t care, so she started hitting him. He smacked her hard, across the face and grabbed her other arm and pushed her on top of her bed. She started kicking in the air and trying to get him off of her, but it didn’t work.

He struggled trying to pull of her underwear and taking off his pants; with her kicking and trying to get away from him. After finally, taking off her underwear and undressing himself; he forced himself on top of her and raped her, ridding her of her innocence. The only thing that truly belonged to her; her beloved virginity.

End of Flashback.

After falling asleep to her own thoughts, she woke up and was sent to the recreation area, where she would watch TV for hours until sent back to her cell. The guards turned to the news, where a case was being discussed.

“For months now the case of 17 years old Camille Hanes, has been on the news. No one really knows the motive of killing her step-father. But she has spoken to her lawyer, who’s told us, it had to do with family. We’ve spoken with her mother, who says that Camille was always a sweet girl, and she regrets not believing her daughter over a man. She wasn’t happy at the fact that he’s now gone and her daughter and her have to suffer; but she’s glad she can now try to fix things with Camille.” The broadcaster spoke.

Camille put down her head, in shame. It wasn’t her fault; at least that’s how her lawyer told her to think of the situation. If only her mother, believed her the first time he raped her. It wouldn’t have lead to her seeking revenge on her own. Her mother had betrayed her, and now she had betrayed her own self. She ruined her life and future.

She got up and decided to head back to her cell; and as she did she heard the song replay in her head. The song of her innocence, ‘Rock-a-bye baby, on the treetop, when the wind blows the cradle will fall.’

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