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junenandy
June N
India

Words: 175
Access: Public
Comments: 13

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Splinter, Wee Story #32

Time flooded each of her minutes. Each second, she saw her home sinking in its flow. Her incorrigible tears couldn’t soak the flaming city of her heart. She caught hold of her aching head in her burning palms and tried hard to delve into the void of her soul.

Why did she find him standing midway, staring at her in all her thoughts and in all her actions? Was there no escape from this invisible intruder, who was hell bent on wreaking a havoc in her weary life? Numbed and blunted by the intangible fixated eyes on her, twenty four hours on end, she cried uncontrollably.

A pricking awareness shot painfully through each cell of hers. Was this a begining or an end to a Good Thing? She realized, she was bleeding from sharp wooden slivers.

Splinters, yes it should be. She was ruptured all over by these thin needles. For the last couple of months, she was trying hard to uproot the colossal fifteen year old tree, that she once believed her home.

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Comments  
junenandy Comment by: junenandy - 2008-07-10 10:06
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Oh yes Nathalie,

Voids are seldom full, so off goes the hollow. Thanks a ton.

June.
spacedlaw Comment by: spacedlaw - 2008-07-10 09:42
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I like the tree image and the splinters. it is worth working with some more. I have a problem with hollow void as well (since voids are seldom full), but otherwise enjoyed the story.
Thanks for the read.
CleverCrow Comment by: CleverCrow - 2008-04-19 14:25
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This is beautiful imagery with classic style. I like the tree part. So many metaphors can be attributed to it. Also I like the way the description of the pain is woven neatly into the narrative. Great work and thanks for your comments too.
raghu Comment by: raghu - 2008-04-17 08:25
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hmm!

good one !
junenandy Comment by: junenandy - 2008-04-16 18:21
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Janet and Anna, Thanks for you wise comments. :)

Regards.
June
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