I've tried to live my life normally like any other girl, but things get hard in a material world. Things I used to care about are laughed at, things that meant something to me once upon a time are dead. And no matter what I do the voice in my head don't love me or help me instead they hate me. No one cares if I fall or die just as long as they get their piece of the pie. Life is hard, life is rough and if you bitch you'll get stuffed. Years pass and your on your ass with no one to love you, no one to help you and no where to go. Take one step to the ledge and let go. It is okay to give up. Each problem with its own solution. YOU CHANGE! YOU CHANGE! YOU CHANGE! Why me? I'm told to try to act like this, try to not say things like that. Because some how every other word I say makes me a verbal criminal in my own house. What the heck is this all about? It's as if everyone else that helps cause my problem is already too far gone to change, and now things get strange and it's me with the same problem again. No where to go, no one I know can help me through a situation like this. I just want to give up alone like I always am in perceptive anguish. Look at the kids of our generation, these gifted kids messed up on pills for erections. Even they have hearts and even they have feelings and the day you say or sound like you don't care, they'll know and disappear. Don't look at me as if I'm simply an attention whore because saying that insults the core of a beast so great when the days get late he arises and avenges those who have been hurt and makes it easier for them to leave and never come back. He has my back. His name is Suicide and his is a beast with nothing to hide...It takes a lot to convince some one to give themselves back to the world. It's not a spare of the moment decision. Remember that when you find my incisions. You're the one who told me I was a bitch and a piece of crap but I'll bet you never told any one else that. Everyone in the world has one thing they love more than them selves. For me it was helping others. I sacrificed to help anyone who needed it and now I'm eating it. All the bullshit, I'm sick of it. No recognition for this condition except for hormones. Hormones can have some devastating effects on a person but every one human being is different. The next time life throws you a fast one stop and think don't blink. Keep your eye on the ball and concentrate before you fall. This is goodbye, maybe not forever. I you're reading this I am successfully out of your life for good and I hope this one thing is understood.
I lived, I died, I loved, I tried. But... Some people weren't mean't for some things...this is the end, or so it seems.
(C)
ALL RIGHTS RESERVED, NO COPIES MAY BE MADE WITH OUT WRITTEN CONSENT FROM AUTHOR

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