the aqueduct
the gutter
catches sun
and moon
at times
the parapets
will need
some reparation
but by and large
the stream
flows clean
from the high springs
drawn
to fill
wells
feed
fountains
taps
the arches
cross
the valleys on the way
where carters
and the workers
in the fields
are shadowed
in their labouring
one day
a keystone
tiring
of its load
will fail
the whisper
of the water
pour
away
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Greatly appreciate your thoughtful comment, and what the poem has evoked. That is most satisfying, and if it brought to mind Hermann Hesse that is complimentary. When I start to write it is rare that I have any preconceived ideas on where I'm going, or intent to expound on any theme. That metaphorical concepts emerge from such a process is one of the delights of writing, and the adventure of it all keeps me going. Even total disasters (in a literary sense) that I regularly produce, can now amuse me, where once I would have cringed with embarrassment. It's only if I catch myself preaching, instead of showing, that I'll blush my shame. Thanks again, Paul, for your response.
Milner |
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interesting -- i am afraid i tend to review by comparison and have to hope that the writer finds the comparison good. this brought to mind herman hesse, and though i know him solely for his prose, there is a certain poetry contained therein. it made me think of "siddartha" in particular and within that book a description of the river which is at once moving and still, and a wonderfully evocative metaphor for life, being that it is at once present at it's source, on it's journey, and at it's end.
this poem had the quality of that idea embodied in it -- the timelessness of the scene. i hope that didn't seem too random, and i hope you got the sense that i enjoyed the piece.
it has a seemingly effortless flow and there are no bumps in the road. |
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