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| I like it! It's economic, but it evokes many other thoughts. Thanks! |
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Comment by: alien - 2008-04-28 05:07
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This is great!
Such an apt form for a poem about mathematics and unpoderable questions about the universe - you can't restrict such things with punctuation :D
I like the way you've laid out the lines apart from the last few. I would have preferred:
is it sound
song
or just
cosmic wrap
But that is personal opinion - because having sound next to song makes it need a comma whereas seperating them negates the need. The last bit, I just think flows better without the 'a' as sound and song had no 'a' either! |
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Comment by: Juan2 - 2008-04-27 13:33
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I like the pondering of the nature of the universe in this... wow, that's says a lot for a subject of a poem :) Trying to figure out how it is all pieced together is one of those things I think we all consider at one point or another, and perhaps this mandelbrot set is a key of insight into it all. Either way, this is an intriguing piece that leaves the reader with a lot to consider.
happy writings. |
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| Interesting. Haven't heard anyone refer to the "big bang" in years, but I don't get out much. LOL. Nice work. j |
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Hello Suzanne,
That last line really did it for me. I'm a sucker for a pun. Ditto Valerie on the big bang. Do capitals count as punctuation, though? Re: 'god is
an architect' - I'd've scratched 'is an' in favour of 'the'. But that's just me.
Enjoyed this - thanks for the read. XX |
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