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Whispers
Softly whisper
in my ear
the words of love
I need to hear
Sooth me
Sweetly
Completely
as you ravage
Savage
and devour
with your
touch ravenous
yet
so gentle….
Seer my ears
with the whisper
of my name
Breath
Deeply
Warmly
as you exhale
Pleasures sighed
while you explore
my skin
so soft
and pale…
Softly whisper
in my ear
Tell me you
you love me
I’ll do the same
We’ll go through
the motions
and
Play
the game …
Let’s pretend
We care
as long as
we’re able
and when
our time
is done
and
we can
no longer
play
You can
Get up
Get dressed
and leave
the fifty
on the table …
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Comment by: MsWizard Online- 2008-04-29 12:00
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| Orpheus, I'm unclear about what you mean when you say "writing on the more fantastic themes of imagination"....perhaps you could email me some ideas? |
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Comment by: - 2008-04-29 11:41
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O Alicia, transactional relationships are my forte because they are so prevalent and not all of the participants realise their occupations.
As usual, I am left reaching for the closest cosmopolitan.
The ending is intriguing as the rest of the poem creates a semblance of passion and intimacy, but in the end it is just money for nothing and unfree kicks and expensive shots.
Not only are you prolific, you have many voices. I hope you begin writing on the more fantastic themes of imagination again. No pressure...just a thought. |
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Comment by: MsWizard Online- 2008-04-28 22:46
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"the style, voice, and imagery remain as cool and pure as summer rain."
Now THAT is poetry....thank you...that's probably one of the best compliments I've ever received on my writing.....
I dont really HAVE a structure...I just throw my stuff out there...I try to write as I speak, and vice versa ... I don't know the technicalities of writing unfortunately...I close my eyes and type, and this is what comes out.....I suppose that sooner or later, I'm going to have to learn... |
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Comment by: mikepyro Online- 2008-04-28 22:35
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the imagery is fantastic, not sure if I 100% love the structure cuz it seems to try too hard for impact with the seperated words so often. maybe it's just me. however, this is only the structure, the style, voice, and imagery remain as cool and pure as summer rain.
great work. |
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Comment by: MsWizard Online- 2008-04-27 17:49
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Done Holly! Thanks!
Yeah it was almost just another love poem....but I was given this inspiration for this ending and had to take it where I could....grin... |
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