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Ugliness
Charred, scarred, molten
Virtually unrecognizable
Words I use to describe
The teapot
I left on the stove too long.
Never thought I’d use those words
To describe
A face.
I can throw away the teapot
Replace it and you’ll never know.
He can’t do that
With his face.
A void where his eye used to be
The other unseeing.
He couldn’t crack a smile
Even if he wanted to.
A ghost hovers above
His mother’s still body.
Bullets ripped his features,
Fire ate his soul.
He can’t replace anything,
Or anyone.
Least of all himself.
Charred, scarred, molten
Now sadly recognizable.
The ugly face of war.
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| Wildefriend - Thanks for the kind words and also for the tip on Rilke's essay. I most certainly will check it out. Much appreciated! |
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| Nicely done. It's to the point. Simple comprehensible images. Interesting transition from a teapot to a face. If you ever get a chance there's an amazing essay about faces that's in The Notebooks of Malte Laurids Brigge by Rilke. You would enjoy it, :-) |
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Comment by: vlm - 2008-05-09 14:50
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That was really cute. I was a bit thrown by a couple of metaphoric pronouns (I, he, his mother). I notice you equate war with the masculine gender ("he"). Is that a female thing, I wonder? Or is it a comment upon the arbiters of war?
A good poem with a cute twist ending. Kudos. |
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| Thanks JB! |
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Comment by: JayBean - 2008-05-09 06:49
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Wow, punchy and descriptive,
very well written.
thanks
J.B. |
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