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SICK AS A DOG
SICK AS A DOG
I feel like shit
My head is spinning
My eyes so tired
Tired of looking at a horizon
Beautiful day
I am sick as a dog
Tied down to my bed
My eye lids getting heavy
Pain unbearable
Escape from reality inevitable
Even in my sleep
I am still sick
I cannot swallow these pills anymore
They leave bitter taste in my throat
They are useless, yet I still take them
Only time will heal my wounds
I am so impatient
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Comment by: pitbull - 2008-05-12 14:41
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| well yeah it is meant to be a raugh poem and meaningless as that is how I feel right now as for breathing I canntot breathe as it is...why do people comment on my worst poem and not some of my other work...Thank you for your comments |
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| Although I can appreciate the sentiment of your words, it is difficult to empathize with them as they are. You need to connect us (the readers) more with your experience. We know you're in pain, your eyes are tired and that you're sick as a dog. Why not describe how sick you are? Better than that--if you're sick as a dog describe your plight in terms of illnesses that a dog might have. Use more descriptive words that will really reach out and grab us, so that we will not feel this is a typical rant that focuses on complaining. :-) |
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| I don't really like it, it's kind of rough and ragged-like someone who forgot to breathe while running a mile, you know? I would reccomend trying to breathe a little. |
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| Are you talking about "Dope Sickness", I used to get that, when I was addicted to pain pills and various other things...... |
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