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Hey June
********************************************
May has faded away
and June has slipped in
looking not for a lover
but a here today,
gone tomorrow, friend.
Someone to laugh with
until our sides ache.
A kindred spirit
who does not judge
but accepts me as I am.
Someone to cry with
until the tears run their course.
An explorer,
who looks beyond the surface,
and sees the beauty within.
If I unintentionally weave memories
that intoxicate you more then one month.
So that a day, week, or even a year hence,
you still yearn for me.
You will always have our intimate secrets
lingering in the whispering wind,
my beloved June friend.
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Comment by: Min - 2008-06-02 23:10
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then = than (as pointed out already)
Liked the flow until the last stanza. Not sure if it's too long and not sure if the words might be refined. Such a change in direction from some of your early stuff and a pleasure to read. |
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| Very nice. Only thing I noticed is a typo: "that intoxicate you more then (than) one month." Thanks for the read. Janet |
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Comment by: PANDORA - 2008-06-02 11:05
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Wow, I uploaded this while heavily medicated for my Fibromyalgia.
It is a blur to me.
This piece makes more sense if you read, “|My May” first. It is a short read.
The idea is just a generic excuse to write something to go along with the months.
Thanks for the comments everyone.
I did consider “than” rather then..”then” but was not sure.
I hoped someone would catch it so thankyousoverymuch. :-] |
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i like the unerlining emotion to the piece. the theme is very interesting. it has real human emotion and it says it in very common emotional language.
nice write!
peace,
MM |
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Comment by: Arley - 2008-06-02 06:30
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| Excellent job, Sheri!! "Whispering Wind" has been used of course but still love the image it conjures, and reckon it was used long before Stairway. |
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