The place for writers: Upload your writing in minutes, receive peer feedback from other writers, poets, authors, then get your work published out there in the real world. Learn how other writers are doing it. |
|
 |
 |
 |
| |
The Slight
They are a thousand glittering sparks
of fantasy,
untouchable moments
scattered
across the tapestry of blackness and
of night.
Forever above the absolute madness
that is this place one can never seem to
escape from, nor understand.
They are a thousand pieces of the
beautiful simplicity
that is so lost to the souls of us all.
Their magic, their splendor, their incomprehensible
contentment
is the truth of something greater
than what I shall ever know.
So likely,
I long not only to gaze upon their consistent brilliance,
but to reach as far as humanly possible
until a strain is brought to my fingertips,
making physical the feelings
that have long since burned in my very own
soul.
Yes, I long to touch them,
to feel their magic racing into my heart
as I grasp one in my hand,
as I steal a bit of the unfathomable
purity
and keep it for myself.
Perhaps the longing deep inside me will finally be quenched with
the final contented exhale
as I release my smothering fist and reveal it all,
and thus…I may finally
understand.
But they are forever untouchable, unreachable,
those scattered reflections
of the deepest light in my spirit.
So underneath the stretch of night sky,
I lay alone.
Still—
and always—
one incredibly small, very insignificant shadow
lying beneath the
stars.
Want to comment on this Poetry?
Sign up to Edit Red and you will be able to comment on Poetry and get access to: Upload your own stories and poems, get readers and their feedback, promote your work...
|
 |
|
[Back to top]
|
|
|
|
| briilant! i think if you see something as magical and wonderful like that, you should do everything in your power to attain it. |
|
|
| Well-written. I'll spare you from a long, redundant comment. |
|
|
This poem reminds me of one of my favorite poems, "Enosis," by Christopher Pearse Cranch, (except with modern twist and a less rigid rhyme scheme). You both coincide with a Socratic longing for "Forms" of perfection that cannot exist in the physical world. Consider the following line from Enosis:
"Like stars that gem the sky,
Far apart, though seeming near,
In our light we scattered lie;
All is thus but starlight here."
Unlike Cranch however, you give me a darker, more tangible longing associated with my generation. You also give me a visceral image of laying in a field looking up at the stars, nice. |
|
|
| It is amazing that though we can not touch them we can see something so very far away. This one makes me want to sit under the stars and just absorb. I love when I can see the moon during the day. This poem works both literally and metaphorically. I am not sure that you meant it literally but very nice piece either way. My only suggestion would be to balance out the lines a little. Very nice piece indeed. |
 |
Comment by: Apollo - 2008-06-22 22:49
|
|
"Perhaps the longing deep inside me will finally be quenched with
the final contented exhale
as I release my smothering fist and reveal it all,"
amazing... my favorite part for sure... longing for a feeling is definitely a subject matter with which I'm familiar... well done. |
| 1 2 Next |
|
 |
 |
 |
|
|
|
| | Advertising - Terms & Conditions - Short Story Submissions - Contact - Writing Competitions - Writing Links - Book Promotion - Sky-Tribe.com - alanemmins.com |
|
 |
 |
 |
| |
Member short stories, poems, comments and other contributions are owned by the poster. Copyright 2003 - 2007 Edit Red I/S | | |