Alien Poetry Challenge 18: There Are No Rules
No boundaries, no crossing guards.
No prizes, consolations, or awards.
There Are No Rules.
All is fair, naught is not.
Kill him, or build a robot.
Kick Him in the Jewels.
Competition is not needed.
But your body, we’ll just beat it.
Standing Still is for Fools.
It’s dirty, but so dirty
We make it almost flirty.
There are no Formal Duels.
We tied the pompous referee
To a ten-foot thorn tree.
Ringed by Poisonous Toadstools.
If you fall, there will be no ambulance,
Only our sneers and opulence.
Over You, We’ll Ride Mules.
So fight, scrabble, and bite for the top.
Just remember to never stop.
There Are No Rules.
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Comment by: alien - 2008-07-02 05:11
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| YEah, reflecting on the other comments, I found this was rambling a bit and never really made a point for me. It uses lots of violent imagery which is great but even violence has to be channeled to make it work effectively. |
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Kind of a violent attitude about this challenge without rules, huh? Your stuff isn't crap, by the way; you have a lot of talent.
Right away if reminde me of Abu Grae
or how ever it was spelled
or how gross prisoners smelled
from all the abuse
that drove someone's muse
and tortured people that way |
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| Thanks guys! |
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Comment by: phillmag Online- 2008-06-24 18:44
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| i thought this a nice twist on the challenge. shorter and less diffuse might work better. |
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Well, you've created a fun rhyming exercise although, sometimes you stretch for a rhyme. This doesn't detract from the poem, just makes it a bit nonsensical.
I wonder if you made the piece a little shorter, without the truly surreal ghouls and pools, would you have a more successful tale or lesson about the anarchy of this Alien 18 challenge?
Thanks for your poem, it made me smile at least and if that was what you wanted to do, you were successful. |
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