I tried so hard to
Understand
All this time
Needing to understand
Having to know
Everything
Though it never came
Fast enough, but
Then I
Made the decision
To love first
Let the understanding come
If it comes

Some prayer and release
Surrendering false beliefs
Letting the past go
Forgiving myself
And everything else
Finally letting things be
The understanding comes
Like spontaneous realizations
But even that doesn't
Matter much now..
Who would've guessed?

Neither knowing nor understanding
Not beliefs, actions, or relationships
All of these things can
Be crossed off the list
The source of my happiness
Is nothing I've found
Not one thing I depended on
Attached to, believed in
Prayer releases each with
No second thought
Forgivingness for all the
Pain that I've caused, then
Flooding the spot with
Respect, peace, and Love


June 26, 2008

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