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Smoke
Smoke rose from the skeletal remains of the metropolis. On a verdant hillside, well away from the carnage, the mischievous breeze told its own subtle story. I inhaled the terrible perfume of scorched fuel and destroyed flesh, and even here, relatively safe from the contamination, the fallout coats the surrounding flora in a thick blanket of ash.
How many got out of the city?
It’s a good question, probably the only real question worthy of consideration. The aerial bombardment had been swift and devastating, the orbiting ships swarming over the sky like industrious insects eager to be about their business.
But there are survivors.
Blind and crippled they wander the area like vagrant spectres, stumbling through the undergrowth with a pitiful dignity that makes me want to weep.
My understanding of military matters is non-existent, but even I can see that it won’t be long before ground troops arrive and the wounded are slaughtered.
It’s time to find sanctuary. I hope to meet more of my kind, and over time we will regroup. We will bury these horrors deep within ourselves and use them to strike back with a vengeance gilded with hate and venom.
The human invaders will pay…
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Comment by: - 2008-07-25 22:45
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| good imagery, good plot, POV tends to wander just a bit for me, some of the sentence structure seems stunted to me,1st person present tense is a powerful vehicle and you use it well, thanks-DC |
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Comment by: DKav - 2008-07-25 13:47
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This is a harrowing tale. I particularly like this sentence: "Blind and crippled they wander the area like vagrant spectres, stumbling through the undergrowth with a pitiful dignity that makes me want to weep."
thank you for sharing. |
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Comment by: Ghetty - 2008-07-25 10:44
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| Nice, great detail of the environment. |
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Comment by: Arley - 2008-07-25 08:35
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| Good tale, Barry, great job with the atmosphere and the ending packed a real solid punch! |
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