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wgallant
Wayne Gallant
United States, FL, Morriston

Words: 54
Access: Public
Comments: 6

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Charmed, I'm sure

My name is legion, my practice is legendary,
I rode into Mumbai on the back of a dromedary.
My hands are sweaty, my limbs all ache,
I have only my flute, a basket, and a snake.
The crowd seems surly, but that's not alarming,
My cobra is fierce, but I'm always charming.

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Comments  
crackednotbroken Comment by: crackednotbroken - 2008-08-09 15:59
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This is darling. I would break up the lines to improve the intended rhythm. Like this;

My name is legion,
my practice is legendary,
I rode into Mumbai
on the back of a dromedary.
My hands are sweaty,
my limbs all ache,
I have only my flute,
a basket, and a snake.
The crowd seems surly,
but that's not alarming,
My cobra is fierce,
but I'm always charming.
Wildefriend Comment by: Wildefriend Online- 2008-08-09 10:16
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Wayne,

I like it but you may want to smooth out the rhythm:

I only have my flute, a basket, a snake

;-)
junenandy Comment by: junenandy - 2008-08-09 00:29
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Aww! You decieve the simpletons?? How do I know you? By your fangless cobra in the basket or your honest confessions? :)

Namaste. J
wgallant Comment by: wgallant - 2008-08-08 23:20
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One may see devils anywhere, but are they actual "sightings" or mere projections?

I once was admiring an oil painting at an art show in Coconut Grove. It was of a small boy catching a football. The background behind his shoulder, where the ball came in contact, was painted a bright red. "A statement about how we teach our children to accept violence", I said to the artist. He replied, "No, it's just a picture of a boy catching a ball."
lflwriter Comment by: lflwriter - 2008-08-08 17:35
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Interesting. Since "legion" is also another name for the devil, I wonder if the narrator in the poem is the devil up to no good. Like the Bible warns us, the false prophets will charm us into believing them and than falling into line right behind them doing what we are told and condemning ourselves to hell for eternity.. The devil was a snake in the Garden and I wonder if this cobra represents that snake. There are many false prophets amongst us and the poems I’m posting over the next few days hopefully will reveal one of them that is also charming--another soft spoken beast in sheep’s clothing.
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By wgallant

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