Since I married into a Chinese family (mainland Chinese), I have witnessed and been part of what I’m writing in today‘s haibun. However, I‘m still confused at times. To the Chinese, ‘saving face’ means saving your dignity--sort of. When the Western media recently said that China was still brutalizing Tibet and Tibet should be free, most if not all of China saw this as an insult and if not dealt with, a loss of face for the entire nation, since, to the Chinese, such claims are lies (My research supports China’s claims--not Tibet’s).

The brutalization wasn’t a lie under Mao--just exaggerated. After all, Mao did order the violent reoccupation of Tibet. However, during the same time, Mao caused all of China to suffer, not just Tibet, through the so-called ‘Great Leap Forward‘, and the ‘Cultural Revolution’. It isn’t well known in the West that many high members of the Communist party protested, and Mao had them eliminated or sent into exile. Today, most Chinese recognize that Mao did horrible things, but they don’t discuss it publicly because it is considered a ‘loss of face’ to have allowed such events to take place.

Metaphorically speaking, when there is an ‘elephant in the room’, the Chinese don’t see it or talk about it. The Chinese know the ’elephant’ is there, but ignore this ‘elephant’ most of the time unlike the Western media that goes out of its way to uncover embarrassing dirt and will slander innocent people to boost profits. This sort of behavior is not acceptable in China. I’m sure if one digs deep enough, he will find exceptions to my claim but if he digs deeper, what I say will turn out correct.

Mostly, the Chinese will deny the existence of drugs, prostitution, men having concubines (which are coming back into vogue in China) and corruption of any kind. The best way to deal with these problems is quietly and to avoid splashing it across the front page of newspapers with huge headlines leading to a loss of face for China.

Has anyone noticed that China’s media has not mentioned Mao during the 2008 Olympics? What Mao did and others allowed to happen is considered one of those ‘elephants’ to be ignored--at least for now.

In the West, the media would claim a cover up and go crazy with front page headlines. However, in China, it isn’t thought of in the same way.
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… the family system is the root of Chinese society, from which all Chinese social characteristics derive. The family system and the village system, which is the family raised to a higher exponent, account for all there is to explain in the Chinese social life. Face, favor, privilege, gratitude, courtesy, official corruption, public institutions, the school, the guild, philanthropy, hospitality, justice, and finally the whole government of China--all spring from the family and village system….

There are the three immutable laws of the Chinese universe, more eternal than a Roman Catholic dogma, and more authoritative than the Constitution of the United States. Their names are Face, Fate, and Favor. These three sisters have always ruled China, are ruling China still. The trouble is that these three are so human and so charming, they corrupt our priests, flatter our rulers, protect the powerful, seduce the rich, hypnotize the poor, bribe the ambitious and demoralize the revolutionary camp. They paralyze justice, render ineffective all paper constitutions, scorn democracy, condemn the law, make a laughing stock of the people’s rights, violate all traffic rules and club regulations, and ride roughshod over the people’s home gardens.

Face cannot be translated or defined. It is like honor and is not honor. It cannot be purchased with money, and gives a man or a woman a material pride. It is hollow and is what men fight for and what many women die for. It is invisible and yet by definition exists by being shown to the public. It exists in the ether and yet can be heard, and sounds eminently respectable and solid. It is amenable, not to reason but to social convention. It protracts lawsuits, breaks up family fortunes, causes murders and suicides, and yet it often makes a man out of a renegade who has been insulted by his fellow townsmen, and it is prized above all earthy possessions. It is more powerful than fate and favor, and more respected than the constitution…. It is that hollow thing which men in China live by.

To confuse face with Western “honor: is to make q grievous error…. Not to give man face is the utmost height of rudeness and is like throwing down a gauntlet to him in the West. Many officials attend between three and four dinners in a night and injure all their chances of a normal digestive system rather than make one of their intended hosts lose face. (My Country and My People. Lin Yutang, Halcyon House, New York: 1938. Pg. 195 to 201)
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senryu

born Chinese walk soft
understand ‘face’ importance
few outside get it

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