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| Those last three lines strip away self delusion like acid on cheap paint. Love it. Love it. |
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| Brief, concise and very, very poignant. I love the feel of this piece. |
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| As much as I love something that's concise and to the point, this could benefit from some additions. The idea is there, and I like what it's saying, it just doesn't say enough of it to really hit me. You're certainly on the right path though. |
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| I would have to agree with SFNovelwriter here.. And I think there could be a little bit more powerful imagery if you made it just a couple lines longer. Overall, it's a nice piece of work. |
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Comment by: - 2006-03-20 09:38
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| I think it's a lovely piece, but the thing to remember is that this person is someone special to another and crying after sex is well an emotional release and if he's a real man, he will understand. It is definatly a short but powerful piece. |
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