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I am legion...
For the longest time now I have realised that I possess the very best of human characteristics & conversely, the very worst.
I am capable of extreme acts of kindness, of selflessness, of empathy, of humanity, i am the light & the word.
I am capable of extreme acts of violence, of hatred, of loathing, of inhumanity, I am the dark & the chaos.
I am legion, I am no one,
I am sentient, though unaware,
I exist, possessor of the lock which holds my extremism bound,
I am art, I am life, I am conscience...
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Thanks for the invite!
I have to say, this is quite the work you have here. I'm not entirely sure I would classify it as a poem, rather a thought process poetically expressed.
It's very true though: there can be no good without evil, no evil without good, and it does exist in all of us. I know it does in me :).
I hope you continue writing like this; it touches its readers. Good work.
.:|Spike|:. |
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| this piece is very lucid for everyone and fluid. For me, the first parts of the poem should be structured like the last stanza- in this way, the physical aspect of the poem would be fluid as it is when reciting. |
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Comment by: Jewels - 2008-10-12 19:11
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Hi, thanks for inviting me to read your work. It was very thought provoking and really triggers off some switches about the light , the dark and the gray areas of the conscious and unconscious mind~ you bravely address these. However, I would say that it doesn't read well as a poem, except for the very last paragraph which reads brilliantly as a poetic stanza.
I am legion, I am no one,
I am sentient, though unaware,
I exist, possessor of the lock which holds my extremism bound,
I am art, I am life, I am conscience...
The lines before this are a pre-cursor to what you want to say in your poem but these very lines above encapsulate the sentiment. I always try to think of a poem in the way that Schopenhauer said any work of art should be~ that it filters through all our experiences , so that what we actually achieve in the work of art is a heightened sense of that experience.
I really like very much the last line, which is rhythm and flow and hits the target exactly.
Keep writing! :-)
*Jewels* |
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| Hi, just wanted to say. The conscience is the key to mortality. Some people never realize thier cruelty or inhumanity, as well as some don't really kknow how truly grenerous they are to other. I liked this alot. Keep up the good work. |
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| Great job Rob! If we don't know about our dark side, how would we recognize our good side? So yes, it is indeed deep, well written and just a wonderful read! |
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